I’ve lived Toronto-adjacent for 22 of my 24 years, but people I know who live in the city proper – people of diverse ages, genders, backgrounds, and sexual orientations – consistently report that Toronto is a terrible city for dating. There are a bunch of theories as to why floating around, mostly in the form of thoughtpieces offering ideas that are by no means unique to the city (“people are too career-focused!” “women outnumber men!”), but I think the core problem is that Toronto is a small city that thinks, and acts, like a big city.
A friend of mine described Toronto as “a city of human subtweets,” an identifier I stole shamelessly when Leo posted about Toronto men. New York-style haughtiness and directness works when you’re living in a city of 8 million, where you can go to the same Williamsburg gay dive bar or LES reggaeton party two weekends in a row and see an entirely different crowd of people each time. It’s less tenable in a city where every single person you would conceivably want to date is, realistically, no more than two degrees of separation away from you at any given time.
The ultimate “this could be us but u playin”